Cooling off Period

Yesterday, I experienced a fear. The fear of not having perfect information. The fear than this uncertainty could actually escalate to a big consequence. But the most important issue was, that i couldn't stop this uncertainty from happening.

If there is ever a avid reader of my post which i doubt there is, you would have noticed that i do not partake much in writing a blog post. And i still maintain my stance that writing a post is troublesome. However, this ironical situation left me with blog post as an only avenue of information dumping.

The reason why i haven't been an avid blogger (if that is still the acronym for people whom blogs) is that i perceive the internet as a double-edge sword. This post isn't about debating the double-edge sword but in short, I cannot control posts that i had written once it goes onto the internet.

Still, coming back to the topic, I'm officially in a cooling off period with my girlfriend of 7+ years. I couldn't  say that i wasn't expecting this to come but as the event unfolds before your eyes, I was left speechless. I couldn't really add a word that could explain myself. Needless to say, my fear sets in.

We had a long talk at her void deck underneath her block after i had abruptly went to her workplace to get her despite my girlfriend's protest. She cried while explaining all that she had kept inside her. *I shall not go into further details since i still want privacy with matters of the exact situation.*

Time fled and it was almost midnight and she has to get home. Although we weren't actually done talking, I guess it was time to leave our face-to-face conversation at that. The remaining of our conversation was through a phone call whereby i had reluctantly accept the conditions of cooling off.




Although the image above does have an element of humor here but i can assure you that having to agree to a cooling off period isn't something that i feel good about. In fact, i immediately felt the chills and loneliness that you could have felt from a breakup. Except that in a Cooling-off period, couples are still attached to each other, officially.

Today is only the first day of an indefinite period of this Cooling-off period. I had to keep telling myself that i should channel my energy into preparing my final lap of university days with my final exams in May. In 2 months time, i would have completed my due courses and would likely to start my career next.

I wouldn't say that i hope to resolve our relationship in a jiffy but our problems does warrant this period of freedom ( if i may perceive) for both me and her. As mentioned from my introduction, I took the responsibility of the reason we have to enter this Cooling-Off period.

I've shared with closed friends of mine that whether was it totally my fault here or partial fault is not up for debate i guess. It doesn't really matters now that we have come to this stage. For now, the advices i received will be to wait, reflect on my right and wrong doings and hopefully, get to change myself for the better.

If I ever will get another chance from this relationship that is.