Meetup. The 5 Love Languages. The Friendly Breakup. Take Care

I didn't want to let my mum know of this Cooling-off period so I told her on Sunday night that i will be going to school to study on Monday. After which, i would then travel to meet up my girlfriend. However, a particular lazy person named Wei Hao (me) woke up at 1pm!

It's really quite awkward later in the day when my mum ask me whether I'm going to have dinner at home. Subsequently, I replied: "Yes but I'm going out after dinner." I don't know whether my tone of voice gave me away or the atmosphere got weirdly, my mum instinctively knew something wasn't right maybe? Anyway, I'm going to fast forward this boring issue that happened in the day. I met up with my girlfriend in the evening.

I waited outside her working place since i was early. Looking ever so forward to see her knock off. When the lights in her workplace went off, I knew she's gonna come out. I was having such mixed feelings but i guess it's the time we finally can talk and understand each other more pertaining to this situation.

Once again, the exact details will be confidential but a summarized part of a macro picture can be given. We walked towards the bus-stop to take a bus to her house. This route, I've taken so many times down the years that I thought i could close my eyes and get there! Anyway, that's not the point. The point is, this bus journey felt shorter than i had expected.

I never knew sitting on a bus, with your loved ones besides you can be a simple yet happy feeling. Although the distance the bus traveled is unchanged, I just felt that the last time was a little different. I just couldn't describe the feeling in words. A sense of savory maybe?

Over the conversation, I got to understand more about ourselves. I was introduced this book called: "The 5 love languages" during the seminar by Sean.

I haven't read this book but here's a quick summary by Sean. He mentioned that there are 5 ways that people express their love. They are:

• Words
• Time
• Gifts
• Acts of services
• Physical touch

Each individual can be an unique combination of the above 5. For me, It's clearly words as well as time that is my way of expressing love. To explain this in a clearer picture, I guess my way of saying "I Love You" is more dominantly in the "words" like messaging and direct communication. Alternatively, I'm also somebody whom express love strongly if I choose to give you my "time", It's an act of saying, I treasure you a lot as well.

Although I'm predominantly strong in the first 2, it doesn't mean i neglect the rest. It's just that I'm weak in other areas. Let's say "Gifts" for example, I'm a person that hardly believes in using gifts as a form of expressing love. However, to my knowledge, gifts is always required in any relationships. So you also can't condone the fact that this 5 languages co-exists and finding a balance would probably help.

My girlfriend is probably a person whom fall under the category of "Acts of services" as well as "Physical touch". Act of services means that the person express love through the actions. It can be very small little acts like fetching your girlfriend to work and knock off etc. Lastly, physical touch refers to expressing love through the direct channel of hugging, kissing. The most traditional form of all i presume.

The above information are a brief summary i got from Sean without having read the book. Hence, I might be wrong about certain information but this book does interest me to find out more. I'll probably buy this book and read when i have more time after my exams.

So, coming back to our conversation. I guess it's probably clear by now that we are going to be just friends. The only time I was pushy during our conversation was to affirm her view that my girlfriend doesn't have the desire to make things work anymore. Her decision was final and the moment of truth came. I later found out that she had initially wanted to talk about the breakup after my exams so that it doesn't affect my studies.

Here's a message for now my Ex-girlfriend:

"For confirming everything, I really thank you, girlfriend. It really sets a sense of relief into me and I'm also happy to be of relief to you to accept this breakup maturely. You would have thought that I might not be able to take this breakup if it comes at this period before my exams. But do not worry much, I'm always a person whom can prioritize my decisions well. I promised that I'll work hard for the remaining months to come.

Moving on probably need some time just like you also require time to inform everybody. I'm glad that we could still be friends. After all, I really got used to you taking charge of cutting my hair. I guess it will take some time before i can start finding another hairstylist as professional and as caring about my hair style other than you.

They say friendship survives best when there is reciprocity. I would like to add a "matrimony of benefits" onto the list. I'll definitely like to have a friend whom is a hairstylist. I don't know what benefits i can offer you yet but I'm sure you might find a friend like me useful in the future to come.

I look forward to seeing you again. As a friend of course. And for the last time that I'm going to say this. I love you, Girlfriend. Take Care."